A reader recently asked a question about what to do when one’s spouse / partner / significant other has serious objections to tattoos.
I know a lot of people do have strong feelings on the subject and tattoos still carry negative images to many people. It’s not easy to get past that kind of visceral reaction and it can often cause big trouble for partners who have opposing opinions on the matter. After all, it’s not like you can get a real tattoo and just wash it off if your partner doesn’t like it.
Tattoos are one of the most permanent ways of expressing one’s feelings. For some of us, it feels necessary to get them. Essential. Part of who we are. We put our feelings into our ink and we mark ourselves permanently to show the strength of what we feel. All of my tattoos were done with a specific purpose in mind. I waited many years before I walked into a tattoo parlor for the first time, but when I went through that door I was certain of what I wanted and why.
Fortunately, my husband has a live-and-let-live attitude and didn’t for a moment think it was his place to say no. In fact, he came along with my daughter and me on one of our trips, and watched the process with interest, although he’ll never get a tattoo himself.
To be honest, I don’t know what I would have done if he’d raised objections. I love and respect my husband and our marriage is one of mutual cooperation (for the most part). Fortunately, over the years we’ve been together, we have learned to communicate, and I would hope that we could have talked about it together and reached some kind of compromise.
In the next messages, I’ll talk about some possible ways to work things out. Granted, I’m not talking from anti-tattoo-partner experience (thank goodness) but we’ve worked out other problems that we feel strongly about and I’ll extrapolate from that.